Enigmatic Apple

I'm doing great! Awesome!! Wunderfool!!!

E heh. ^_^;;

Oh, Ira! Your name should've appeared in Utusan's Family and Law section today (Friday 30.3.2007). If you don't get Utusan over there, I'll scan and upload it somewhere you can grab.

Oh, and I have achieved great progress with regard to my weight loss mission. At 85 KGs, I've officially lost 11 KGs more. Nya haha! Hopefully, I'll get to my proper weight before the end of the year. *pumps fists*

I'm not depressed anymore. Well, I am sad, on many days. Listening to people's problems day in and day out will do that to you. But I'm doing great, mentally. I'm less tired now (love the working hours). My eating habits are good, more or less. I have wonderful, supportive, FUN colleagues. I don't hate / resent my superiors. My self-esteem is at a healthy level. I feel much better here and now than I ever did last year at that law firm.

I finally have free time to spend my money. Have been going to see numerous shows (many of them terrible; some rather excellent). Bought many books and comics (my Patrick O'Brian maritime collection is close to complete, and I'm going to steadily stoke my Chuck Palahniuk-love - Fight Club is getting lonely on my bookshelf. Also bought the entire set of English-translated Petshop of Horrors *gasp!*). Bought some plushies - I got myself a foot high Ryuk holding an apple (albeit squashed, making it look like a tomato instead...). Got some awesome gadgets (1 GB multi-purpose mp3 player at RM95; 4 GB thumbdrive at RM 130...). Loads of pirated DVDs (my Edward Norton collection is almost complete! Yay!).

Oh! I have also gotten into stickers. Laser stickers are awesome, y'all! This is all my colleague's fault. I go shopping for them at the Masjid Jamek flea market area every week. RM1 per sheet. *loves* I also have discovered a wonderful flower market near Petaling Street. Dear gods, I went to school in CBN, tuition at Kasturi, chambered at Wisma KH and I HAVE NEVER known about this place. What insanity! They sell a bouqet of 20 roses at RM12! Of course, they aren't treated. But I'd rather treat them myself and do what I will with them for RM12 rather than fork RM40 for treated ones, and having to stem them anyway before I can arrange them. And they have the nicest and rarest range of colours too! Black and purple and hot orange and so on. Also love their lillies collection. *loves loves*

On a side note, I am afraid of being immune to the troubles of the world. The other day, I came across a case where the 9-year old illegitimate daughter of a sex worker was gang-raped front and back by her clients, and I sat there thinking: "I've seen worse." It's only an hour or so after that, that the horror dawned on me, and I had to go puke my brains out.

Oh, the 'detached third party' training that I've put myself through in order to stay sane at this job does help me cope better. I can listen to clients whose husbands poured lye down their bodies as punishment for not keeping the baby quiet or to prove that they haven't had extramarital affairs, and not flinch in shock. Well, I do still flinch in response, sure, but that's it. Hopefully you people understand what I mean; I can't explain it better than that. But I do still can't help crying, for example, when the sixth police station turned us away when we ask for help. "World Police Day"... Pah! What / why exactly are we celebrating? Their ability to give Friday sermons armed with an M-16? Their zeal in putting a clearly abusive husband / father in jail? The strength with which they force back a group of civilians and activists whose only aim was to protect the houses of some oppressed citizens from being demolished after having called that area their home for far too long? What?! *rant! rant!*

Wokey. I guess that's it for now. See you guys around! Take care and may God's blessings be upon y'all always!!

Yeah. It's decided. Seiya-chan and I are going to catch Death Note 2 again when it officially opens. We're thinking of getting tix for next Friday, preferably the midnight show. Afterwards, I'm crashing over at her place.

We're going to MVC GSC.

Two reasons, mainly: We need to watch the thing on a bigger screen - no way would we be satisfied with what we got a Cineleisure. Also, anyone who thinks that watching the movie once would be ample enough to provide for our "L fix" is in severe need to see a Vet.

Which, again - and I know some of you have had enough of me screaming my heart out for this - L is LOVE!!

Also, I might go for a third round, like I did with Movie 1.

Akari.

Don was excited to go bear hunting. He spotted a small brown bear in the
woods and shot it. All of a sudden, he felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned around to see a big black bear. The black bear said, "Don, you've got two choices: Either I maul you to death or we have sex." Don decided to bend over.

Even though he felt sore for two weeks, Don soon recovered and vowed revenge. He headed out on another trip, where he found the black bear and shot it.

There was another tap on his shoulder. This time a huge grizzly bear was
standing right next to him. The grizzly said, "That was a huge mistake Don. Now you've got two choices: Either I maul you to death, or we have rough sex."

Again, Don thought it was better to comply. Although he survived, it took several months before Don finally recovered. Outraged, he headed back to the woods, managed to track down the grizzly and
shot it. He felt the sweet taste of revenge.

But then there was a tap on his shoulder. Don turned around to find a giant polar bear standing there. The polar bear said, "Admit it Don, you don't really come here for the hunting, do you?"

*cracks up*

Pardon me, folks. I'm facing yet another day of cleaning and unpacking. Early morning laughter is my only hope to face the rest of the day gung-ho-ly.

The following is what the stars have in store for Capricornians today. I got this from Friendster.

The Bottom Line
Someone who has a thirst for power might try to enlist you in plans today.

In Detail
Someone who has a thirst for power might try to enlist you in plans to overthrow others in a powerful position. This person's plans aren't fully worked out yet, so joining him or her is not a wise idea. If you can, find a way to avoid the fracas altogether. Focus instead on making the best of this difficult situation. Now is not the right time to join a revolution. Think smart, and bide your time for a few more days

My Take
This is so wrong. First off, I certainly would not be offered by any power-hungry megalomaniac to join a coup for the simple reason that I would be the one to plan it to begin with. Second, there is never a right time to join / carry out a revolution - there's only the necessary time. Also, who exactly am I supposed to overthrow in this country? None of the current politicians are worth my effort, and they won't be changing in a few days either.

My Boadicea Day is far-off still, though it will surely come someday. At the moment, though, I'm deeply considering to work / volunteer with the Sisters-In-Islam where I'm currently serving my Legal Aid duty. They do good work here, and I'm utterly fascinated by their dogma and the strength with which they fight their cause.

Mates, I do believe that I'm awakening to a new calling.

Akari.

A French teacher was explaining to her class that in French, unlike English, nouns are designated as
either masculine or feminine.

"House" is feminine - "la maison"
"Pencil" is masculine - "le crayon".

A student asked "What gender is `computer`?"

Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the
class into two groups: male and female, and asked them to decide for themselves whether "computer" should be a
masculine or a feminine noun. Each group was asked to
give four reasons for their recommendation.

The men`s group decided that "computer" should
definitely be of the feminine gender ("la computer"), because:

1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic

2. The native language they use to communicate
with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else

3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for possible later review

4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your salary on accessories for it.

The women`s group, however, concluded that computers should be masculine ("le computer"), because:

1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on.

2. They have a lot of data but still can`t think for themselves.

3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem, and

4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.

According to the joketeller, the women obviously won.

Hey, all in good clean fun!

Akari.

I totally forgot to mention this. Sometime last week, Seiya-chan told me that she saw an advert on the GSC website (I think) about Death Note the movie being screened over here. Although not too big of a fan - unlike Pluto, at least - we decided that this is something which would definitely be an awesome way to spend a Friday night. It's supposed to open on Thursday the 9th, and we figured we'd go catch a late show, if one is available, on the subsequent night.

That was, until Sunday came, which of course brought along with it the Sunday Star, which Mei read more thoroughly than any of us - bless her heart - resulting in this superb news: A free screening of the film will be held on Saturday the 4th at GSC 1-U at 11 a.m.. 272 tickets are to be given away on November 1st i.e. tomorrow starting at 10 a.m. The best part is that the first 20 people will not only get a pair of tix each, they also will get some awesome and apparently expensive freebies in the form of a limited edition folder and telephone dangle set worth RM200. Whoah!

Pluto is, of course, going. Aiming to get the freebies also, without a doubt.

In the beginning, I wasn't so sure what I would do about it. On one hand, I do have to do some work in the area on Wednesday morning, which means I could just go there beforehand and collect the tix. On the other hand, I just thought that I stumbled upon some good luck; being able to sleep in for a bit tomorrow (the work I have to do there is rather late in the day). What to do? What to do? I asked myself. That is, until this afternoon.

When something awesome yet terribly terrible struck me.

I was attacked by an unreasonable, slave-driving, refuses-to-freaking-leave-me-alone voice. It tells me- nay, shouted vehemently at me is more like it- that I have to be the first in line for the tix. That no matter what, I have to come away with the tix and the freebies.

Yep. Some of you might recognise the voice. Apparently, my gung-ho spirit decided to pay me a visit and drive me insane. What's a girl gotta do?

Of course, she consulted some of her most trusted, passionate invalid friends. I got mixed results: Seiya-chan said there's no need for me to arrive so early. (I'm planning to arrive sometime between 2 to 3 a.m. Yes, your eyesight worked absolutely fine). She said I should arrive at about 6: it'd already be daylight but I would still probably be early enough not to miss a good spot. Jan's reaction was one of utter incredulity. Her almost exact words were: "Are you insane? Is this movie going to be that awesome?". Pluto, on the other hand, was telling me that I should arrive early because there would surely be a crowd there, the show being extremely popular. She herself can only come at 6 am at the earliest. So, come decision-making time.

Of course, I listened to my gung-ho spirit, as I'm always prone to do regardless of how crazy the acts are.

In any case, I'm packing my queuing gear: My MP3 player is loaded with upbeat tunes and its 2 sets of batteries are fully charged, I'm taking Pram's The Fugitive with me just in case songs won't do the trick, and I have some sour mum-mums for final back-up.

I'll be totally alright for the rest of the day on an hour's worth of sleep. My midnight transport will cost me a hefty RM40. There's a chance that I'm totally overestimating people's reaction to the article. I may be waiting in line all alone in the dark...

*hangs head* The things I do for adrenaline-pumping moments, huh? Shyeah, right.

Then again, it'd probably be worth it. After all, I do not want to repeat the Harry Potter Kino moment. No sirree.

Wish me luck, peeps!

Akari.

Hey guys! This is an urgent and important notice from the Royal Malaysian Police.

Take note all females. Recently, violent rapes have been taking place daily in many areas within Kuala Lumpur, Selangor and even Negeri Sembilan. The criminal is believed to be a black magician who has been terrorising the abovementioned areas. He intends to rape a total of TWO THOUSAND (2000) women in order to complete his training.

He isn’t choosy when it comes to selecting his victims: all females, be it young or old from all walks of life had fell prey to his malice. Up to now, hundreds have come forward to lodge reports of having been raped violently by him, mostly in their own homes. The police are helpless in capturing him; his black magic is much too powerful for the law enforcers to do anything. Apparently he morphed into a mosquito in order to get into the homes of his targets. He then transforms back into his human form in order to commit the heinous crimes. Afterwards, he changes back into a mosquito and flew away scot-free from the scene of the crime.

Hundreds of witchdoctors, shamans and the like have been brought in from all over the place – including the deepest forests of Indonesia – in order to help the police capture this seemingly invincible serial rapist and put a stop to the crimes. Unfortunately, the rapist’s black magic skills are much too powerful and none of the help has managed to catch him. Until today, he is still loose and is going to violently rape more women until his goal is reached.

Warning to all women who live and/or sleep alone, it is not advised to lock your doors as this would prevent you from getting any help from outsiders if this vile criminal were to decide to pay you an unwanted visit.

We repeat that this black magician serial rapist has yet to be caught and is still at large. He has been spotted recently in the Lembah Klang area. Please take extreme precautions for your safety. One known method that is recognised to be a sure-fire way of preventing you from being his next victim is:

RIDSECT!!!

Hahaha! Gotcha!

By the way, Happy Halloween!

Akari.

The subject refers. Burp!

Excuse me.

Well, first was at First Aunt's house in Taiping on Tuesday, which was a superb way to start the celebrations. Then there was Ira's open house on Friday. And tonight as well.

No, it wasn't an open house. Sorry guys: no invites. It was a private thing; we had it because my 2nd bro was very insistent. Not that he had to do any of the actual barbecuing, which, naturally, is the task for yours truly. ^_^

Not that we caan hold a normal big barbecue session, anyway. Mom and I went to the super yesterday, to find almost everything gone from the shelves. Of course, with the amount of celebration everyone's having, and all the open houses, you can't expect to be able to buy any grocery. We did get away with roughly a kilo of beef and two whole chickens, plus some essential salad ingredients. We were thankful for all that.

I'm still smelling of burnt charcoal, but am very full. My mom's marinates are still legendary.

... Will I be able to stay awake at the SIS centre tomorrow?

This year's celebration is not as taxing as those of the previous years. I'm alright. I don't know if I'd be able to host any open house this year because of the move and all. Still, drop by whenever. There will be food, I promise. ^_^

Akari.

A group of girlfriends are on vacation when they see a 5-story hotel with a sign that reads: "For Women Only". Since they are without their boyfriends and husbands, they decide to go in. The bouncer, a very attractive guy, explains to them how it works.

"We have 5 floors. Go up floor by floor, and once you find what you are looking for, you can stay there. It's easy to decide since each floor has a sign telling you what's inside."

So they start going up and on the first floor the sign reads: "All the men on this floor are short and plain." The friends laugh and without hesitation move on to the next floor. The sign on the second floor reads: "All the men here are short and handsome."

Still, this isn't good enough, so the friends continue on up. They reach the third floor and the sign reads: "All the men here are tall and plain." They still want to do better, and so, knowing there are still two floors left, they continued on up. On the fourth floor, the sign is perfect: "All the men here are tall and handsome." The women get all excited and are going in when they realize that there is still one floor left.

Wondering what they are missing, they head on up to the fifth floor. There they find a sign that reads: "There are no men here. This floor was built only to prove that there is no way to please a woman."

Hey, it is sorta true...

Akari.

Take each letter of your name and substitute it with the Japanese sound to the right of the letter. Names might be kinda long.

* A - ka
* B - zu
* C - mi
* D - te
* E - ku
* F - ru
* G - ji
* H - ri
* I - ki
* J - zu
* K - me
* L - ta
* M - rin
* N - to
* O - mo
* P - no
* Q - ke
* R - shi
* S - bi
* T - chi
* U - do
* V - wu
* W - he
* X - na
* Y - fu
* Z - zi

I got Chikutomori Kamekashiki. Not bad at all, yeah? Heh, Jan will definitely hate me now that I can call myself 'Kame'. Heh heh *Dejiko style*

There are good things in life, after all. Even at this late hour. And considering that it's Friday The Thirteenth. In October, on top of it all. ^_^

Akari.